Today I learned...

... that those Reese Peanutbutter Eggs ARE NOT ONLY 2 PTS!!  I've been misled... they're actually 4 pts.  In an act of extreme willpower, strength, and "I don't know where the h*ll it came from" I ate half and gave the other half to bf.  Oh man am I growing ;)

Picture This

As someone who has done this journey before one of my biggest regrets is not taking progress pictures and not having enough pictures of me when I was at my smallest before.  I think there is one picture and my mom has it hangin on her wall.  When I gained all the weight back I used to stare at it and remember how good I felt and wonder "what happened??"  It wasn't a great picture and it bothered me that I never took more pics of myself when I felt so great and so skinny.  Any other time I would have hated having my picture taken.  When I restarted weight watchers I didn't realize that I was going to be as successful and again I had a regret... I didn't take any before pics.  I have plenty of pics of me overweight but none that I could really compare a good after shot too.  So, anyway this time I'm making my boyfriend take pics of me... lol.  Its feels so silly because I'm so not a vain person, I'm not that girl that just loves to pose for a pic, in fact, I'm usually the one holding the camera which is exactly why I'm not in my own pics.  But I'm really trying hard this time to get over it and document my progress and my journey.  I don't ever expect to put the weight back on but I just want to have a lot of pics of me at a time when I feel really good about myself, sexy & healthy, and even though I have another 15 or so to lose I still want to be able to compare myself to now once I get there.  So, I have decided to post pics of myself on here.  This makes me squimish, I hate the way my face looks in pics hahaha I'm not trying to be self-deprecating I just never think I look like me.  But since this is MY blog, MY journal, MY progress MY journey and basically all about ME I have decided to post a pic of MEEEEE.  Also, having posted progress photos a few blogs back I never thought it would have such an impact on me.  I know now, more than ever, that documenting my progress from here on is sooo important.  I hate that I never took measurements too, I would love to know how many inches I've lost but I'll never know and I'm not going back just to find out!!   Peace

<--- Ok this picture makes me want to cry (remember I said I didn't have any great before pics), but the really scary things is I did not birth that child but it looks like I should have, him and his 3 brothers.

Well I have to be honest, I'm having an anxiety attack right now.. lol.  I need to go run and decide for sure whether I can handle having these pics out there.  Help me!!

Today I learned...

... that nothing is truly worth eating if you don't take the time to savour & enjoy it.   Enhaling a donut and not remembering the taste of a single bite you took is a major waste of 300 calories.. 

Sometimes that donut is just meant to be.

Today after my weight watchers meeting I did something I only do every other month (I swear) and that is go to Krispy Kreme for a donut after my weigh in.  There's actually one in the same parking lot as Weight Watchers, how mean is that??? Ok but usually I resist but today I said WTH...  oh and btw down 1 lb holla!
So I went in for my donut, my bf wouldn't go thru the drivethru for one donut (don't ask, I think he was trying to deter me).  I went up to the register, asked for the one I want and all of a sudden this woman that was behind me goes "here! Happy Valentines Day" and shoves a Valentine in my hand.. lol.  Ok wtf? I look down at it and it read "happy valentines day - one free donut - Krispy Kreme"..  hahahah I was so taken off guard I'm like are you sure? thanks...  i was so confused.. I asked the girl at the counter if it was good to use she said yeah and handed me my free donut.  lol.  As I turned around and exclaimed to the lady waaay to loudly thanks HAPPY VALENTINES DAY realizing afterwards it was weeks ago. ugh *blush*
The funny thing is stuff like this happens to me all the time, I always get deals when I'm not expecting them, like stuff will ring in cheaper at the register than the listed price,  I'm talking all the time this happens.  Positive energy people, can't stress it enough.
So as I get into the jeep and tell my bf what just happened he said, see aren't you glad I made you go in... typical. So the moral of the story ~ when a donut is meant to be its meant to be.

Today I learned...

... that drinking too much Wyler's Light gives me a headache.  This sucks because I've developed an addiction. 
... if something seems to good to be true it probably is.  Example: see above :(

Today I learned...

... that Reese Peanut Butter Eggs (you know, that commercial thats on every 5 mins) are only 2 pts.  Oh thank god, ok Easter can proceed as scheduled *phew*.  

Trying to visualize warm weather *humph*

Just the other day I was blogging about running in a short sleeve shirt ~ today earsmuffs & gloves again.  Ugh, this winter is exhausting.  Its like a bad movie that just when you thinks it over it keeps going.  I'm so over it.  My parents are in Ft Myers right now, so jealous.  Well, the main thing is I ran even though it was cold.  I'm feeling extra motivated this week to exercise because I'm approaching a milestone.  Well, 2 actually but one I'm soooo excited about.  The first one is I'm 2.8 away from 40lbs, that will rock buuuuuut this morning I weighed 161.2 which means I'm 1.4 lbs away from being in the 150's!!!  I'm so excited about this I could scream.  My goal is 147 which means I'm on the homestretch!!  I am prepared to stay in the 150's for a while and that's ok because when I'm there I'll know that I'm just 10lbs overweight!! Boy is that a long way from where I was...
Anyway, another thing I wanted to talk about is visualization.  This morning before I ran I was sitting at my kitchen table, eating my oatmeal and filling out the first entries in my WW Journal.  Every morning I weigh myself and write it in my journal so I can keep track of up & downs and so on.  Well, beside this mornings weight I wrote big numbers 159, and I started just visualizing that number. 159 159 159 159.  Then I had a flashback..

**** Insert Note:  Right now my boyfriend is eating a Hot Pockets and chips and its smells so good I want to kill myself ****

Anyway back to my flashback, it was in the summer and I was in Nova Scotia running on my treadmill and I remember as I'm running going 179 179 179 179.  hahahaha..  Well I guess it worked, the 170's have come and gone like a faint memory in time. 
Do you guys visualize your dreams?  I know that when the "Secret" craze hit a lot of people I know jumped on this bandwagon of the "law of attraction" and so forth, I have actually been following this belief system since I was younger, my mom got me into it.   I really do believe if you put positive energy into the universe positive things will happen in your life.  I also don't rely on miracles to happen and I'm not expecting to see any talking snakes or burning bushes but as far as my life is going I'd say I've had everything in life I've ever needed...... even if from time to time I try to visualize diamonds and fancy running watches... hey its worth a try ;)
Hope you're all having a beautiful day!!

I bought a new mug last week (I love, and have a small collection of my favorite, big mugs) so in the spirit of my blog today, here it is.

Relax Deeply

Dream Big

Believe with all your Heart

Today I learned...

... that I am genuinely torn between who I loathe more, Tiger Woods or John Edwards.  Both completely repulse me and should be castrated.  Too much?  Ok fine.  I deteste John Edwards more probably, I'd just kick Tiger Woods "there".  Ahhh that actually felt good just typing that out. 

Another Random 10

Its time again for "Randon 10" I guess, basically because there's not a lot to blog about today and I realize I haven't ranted in days.. maybe not having so much to rant about is a good thing..  So I just figured I'd create another list about me for something to do.  When I decide to blog a list like this I never know what I'm going to say so I just end up sitting here for 10 minutes trying to think of something to say about myself.  Its harder than its should be but here goes
10 random things about me - Part Deux

1. I watch Jeopardy every night.  In case you haven't figured it out I love trivia.  I also think Alex Trebek is super adorable... and Canadian baby.
2. I have all 10 seasons of Friends on dvd and watch them quite regularly.  I have this weird idea like they're really my friends.. *don't judge me!*
3. I am fascinated with US Presidents (even though..  yes.. I'm canadian)... I love the trivia of them and know quite a lot of interesting facts about them.
4. My favorite actor - without a doubt - 100% - Edward Norton..  I think he's amazing in every way. I've seen everything he's been in.
5. When I was 12 my parents offered me $100 to not have pop or chips for one year... I won! 
6. I take things very personally, and if you asked anyone in my life they would probably tell you the exact opposite is true.
7. I love reading health & fitness mags - actually I'm borderline addicted.  Favorites are Women's Health, Runner's Mag & Weight Watchers.
8. I have a fear of bridges.  Also, I'm scared to death of heights but I sometimes forget how bad and find myself in a height predicament and go into full-on panic mode.
9. I have never had a broken bone and have never spent the night in a hospital. *knock on wood*
10.  I hate bugs!  Not as much in nature but if there's a bug in my house I FREAK OUT!  I feel like its an invasion.. lol  its sounds silly but ask my bf, I'm not exaggerating.

Well again, not in any particular order, I just write them as the most random insignificant things pop into my head.  That took about 30 mins.  I'd love to hear some random facts about you all too!!!

Today I learned...

... that Wikipedia has a "did you know" section.  This makes me happy because I love random facts, and this one in particular made me giggle -
... that R&B singer Barrence Whitfield changed his name from Barry White, to avoid confusion with the other Barry White, who had changed his name from Barrence. 
... that the little things in life that make me (and usually noone else) laugh are what keep me going.
... that hippos have killed more people on safari than any other animal. 

Today I learned...

... that the world's largest hot air balloon carried 61 people.
... that the Declaration of Independance was written on vellum.  I've drawn blueprints on this stuff and its awful to work with but lasts forever haha go figure.

Today I learned...

... that the smaller I get the more noticeable it is when I lose a small amount of weight.  This is a very. good. thing.

It's Your Life!

I forgot how much I love running in a short sleave t-shirt.  Its a beautiful day here in North Carolina folks and its the first day in months I ran without my headband & gloves, not to mention warm coat zipped up to my nose.  Reasons to go outweighed the reasons to lay on my couch.  Even though reasons not to go weigh 3 times as much (isn't it funny how that works) I had to work off that IHOP spinach & mushroom omelette from a few hours earlier because *guess what* we're going out to dinner again this evening.   Geez, I never do this but when it rains it pours.. this time its raining commitments.  All fun commitments so I'm not complaining, aaaand I got to see my parents whom I haven't seen in 7 weeks and they gave me the most wonderful boost in spirit and compliments.
Now back to food, *point of fact* - IHOP does not list all their nutritional info on their website (red flag much?) but I tracked down the info online.  So if anyone cares ~ Cal 679 Fat 7.4 Fibre 2.8 Sodium 1097.9 (oops) AKA 14pts.  Isn't that lovely!! Well I suppose it could have been worse if I had gotten the pancakes on the side "just fruit for me thanks".  

Anyhoo, I just felt liking writing out the words to a song I listened to twice in a row while running lol.  I hope it inspires you, it inspires me  ;)  Hope you're all having a beautiful weekend!!

This is the moment, its on the line

which way gonna fall?

In the middle between wrong & right

but you know after all

Its your life whatcha gonna do?

The world is watching you.

Every day the choices you make say what you are

and who you heart beats for, its an open door

It's your life!

Are you who you always said you would be?

With a sinking feeling in your chest.

Always waiting for someone else to fix you,

tell me when did you forget

Its your life

To live the life that you believe

this is your opportunity

to let your life be one that lights the way

Today I learned...

... a new appreciation for what I weigh and how I look right now. 

What losing and gaining 10lbs looks like!!

I just got back from my meeting, down 1.6 woooooooo hooooooooo.  I love that number, I have lost 1.6lbs six times, more than any other amount.. lol.  Anyway, not much else on my mind today just wanted to share my success.  Today is cheat day and we're going to see Shutter Island tonight and I'm dying for some movie popcorn with butter.. yummmm.
Since there's nothing else going on I thought I'd share some pics.

Here's a pic I took in November and one I took this morning before WW.  I tried to recreate the before photo so I could compare.  I took front, side & back but all I have the nerve to post is the side view right now, and I'm really trepidatious about even posting these.

Wow is all I can say, and the scary thing is thats not a before~before pic, that was 10lbs ago!! (10.6 to be exact)  I showed my boyfriend these pics and in celebration he picked me up and body slammed me.. lol.  That was the best feeling I've had all day ;)

Today I learned...

... that I have 3 new awesome followers; Jess, Lorie & Suzi.  Welcome and *HUGS*  Also, *shout out* to my four fabulous former faithful followers; Kat, Cary, Josie & DizzyMcNizzy.

Good Day, Sunshine

Today I'm in a good mood, the sun is shining, its beautiful outside, I got my run in this morning and *bonus* they're not calling for snow this weekend (imagine that) so no chance of missing my meeting *knock on wood*.  Also all the painting is done!! Thank god for that.  Its been a long week.  Lets see if this smile holds out till after tomorrow's weigh in.  My weight has been dropping every morning and I've had a really good week keeping within my points.  YAY!  Also, I'm about to have some of my delicious chili, that always makes me happy. 

So, the other day when I went grocery shopping I thought I might check out some Crystal Light for a change.  Actually, water has never been a problem for me, I always have a one litre bottle on the go and on a good day I drink 3-4.  But I thought just to add some low-cal flavor to my day I'd buy some Crystal Light.  Well, I found it in the grocery store and it was over $4 for the pack.  I'm sorry that just wasn't worth it to me, I'm not stingy but I know when something is overpriced.  Anyway today I was at the Dollar General and found these ~

For a dollar...  One Dollar
Wylers Light... hahaha, works for me.
They have 10 cal per packet and no sugar.  They're really good too ~ like really good.  Now I'm not from the States so Dollar General is new to me and I don't know if its everywhere (I'm in North Carolina).  I'm sure you can find it at any type of dollar store. 

Well folks, weighing in the morning, wish me luck and good luck to all Saturday WW'ers!!!!

Today I learned...

... another awesome WW recipe.
... that a week without exercise is not the end of the world.  As long as I up my water and watch my nutrition I can still lose weight.

Hamburger Pie

If anyone has picked up the new Mar/April issue of Weight Watcher Magazine, I recommend trying the hamburger pie featured on page 72.  I just had it for supper, its really really good and *bonus* my boyfriend loved it.  He's always my gauge as to whether a recipe is too "diety" (if that makes sense).. and it passed the test.  Now, in keeping in line with the ground turkey kick I'm on, I substituted it, other than that I followed the recipe to a T.  Anyway, just wanted to share.  Its so not my style to try a recipe out of a magazine but I saw hamburger pie...???  sign me up :)  And as I've said before, I totally dig recipes that consist of ingredients I have on hand anyway.  If anyone tries it let me know what you thought, or if you want the recipe let me know, I'll hook you up.  Enjoy!!

Today I learned...

... that there are messages and signs everywhere to inspire us and keep us motivated.  Today as I peeled off the lid of a brand new package of light sour cream I looked down and on the tin foil seal it was written "Jumping for joy is good exercise".  I couldn't agree more ;)

I can't believe its actually butter, well margerine.

Yesterday was grocery day, *sigh* my favorite day.  I just love going out and discovering new food items that are low cal.  I love reading labels and comparing, and don't get me started on the produce section.  I love buying a ton or F & V's.  Anyway, I was most excited about finding this butter spray that I had "discovered" while watching "Ruby".  She was raving about this "I can't believe its not butter" spritz stuff, and how its 0 calories.  UM WHAT? Why has noone ever told me about this?!?  Ok, so I will admit something here and it may be a little embarrassing.  I did think back to certain times when I may have seen on a blog somewhere or a recipe or heard people maybe mention butter spray but I thought that they were talking about butter flavored Pam (heehee oops) and I was always like "noone is going to convince me that spraying Pam on a baked potato or popcorn is a reasonable substitute.. I'll use a tsp of butter and sacrifice the points thank you".  Well, I didn't know that there was an actual butter spritzer (I'm sure its Margerine but for 0 cal who really cares).  I'm sure I'm the last person in this alternate universe to know about this but I'm soooooo excited. I bought the Parkay brand, it was exactly the same by comparison and cheaper, hello.  I put it on my veggies last night and then I made popcorn, you know, just to see if it worked.  DElish! Anyway peeps, its been added to my latest "discoveries & addictions" list but I felt I needed to add a little something in case you all are like "yeah we've all known about it for years" lol.

Today I learned...

... that painter's trim liner tape (whatever you call it) is the least adhesive stuff on the planet.  I might as well lick a piece of paper and stick it up there, it would probably hold better. 
... that painting I love, taping the trim and baseboards I DON'T LOVE!

Pillow Talk

Last night as I lay in bed, I said to my bf "why is it that I can never appreciate the weight I am right now?"  I feel like this weight loss challenge I've embarked on is not allowing me to be in the moment and appreciate where I am right now.  I'm always trying to lose another pound.  I lose that pound and all I can think of is the next pound and the next and the next.  It occured to me last night when I was thinking about how that morning I was 0.2 less than I was Monday of last week and how depressing that is to me.  But here's the kicker, when I had 30+ pounds on I would have killed to be the weight I am.  I'm sure I've even had conversations with my self that promised once I got to this weight I would be at least satisfied for the moment.  Still trying to get the rest off, obviously, but if I was this weight or in this "decade" of weight (160's, 170's, 180's even) I would have to be thrilled (its seemed so small to me back then).  Well, I am thrilled don't get me wrong but the longer I stay at one particular weight I start to feel like I'm going back up.  Does that happen to anyone else?  I'm not going up but because I'm not going down I feel blah.  This is a sickness I think, I'm a weight watcher-aholic, it is comsuming every minute of my life and I feel like I'm not present in the moment at any time.  Not taking a moment to realize I look good as I am right now. 
Then something completely different occured to me.  What happens when I am done with losing weight, and I'm trying to maintain.  Now, let me just say this, I have seen what me maintaining looks like and I can get by with 2-3 cheat meals per week and only running 2-3 days.  Already this screams danger for me, I don't ever want to start thinking that its ok to slip off my routine, but what happens when I don't have losing weight to consume my life, what will it be then?  What will I do when I'm not losing weight?  I'm starting to think I don't have it all figured out...  hmmm.... that is definitely a new concept to me......

On another note (and if this doesn't make me feel better nothing should), yesterday I was digging thru my draw of "comfy clothes" looking for something old I could wear painting.  I pulled out an a pair of sweats I hadn't worn in forever, I held them up and me and J just laughed.  He goes "good for you baby" hahaha.. they were HUGE.. omg I couldn't believe it, I threw them on since I'm never wearing them again anyway.  They had a draw string so I just tightened them up.  I spent the whole day hiking them up, it was really annoying they are waaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyy too big. lol

Today I learned...

... that you should never plug a laptop adaptor into a 6V drill.  heehee oops *smoke*

Today I learned...

... Turkey meatloaf is quick, easy, and delicious.
... all I needed was a good run. 
... that the Luge is an very boring sport to watch and um dangerous WTF?!?.

O-M-G Turkey Meatloaf for 2

Ok, so I'm on a bit of a ground turkey kick these days.  I just finished eating the most DElish turkey meatloaf.  I got if off this website so I must give props.

http://weight-watchers-points-recipes.blogspot.com/2009/02/turkey-meatloaf-45.html

Alright, it was absolutely yum.  I have renamed it (you may have guessed) O-M-G Turkey Meatloaf.  That's because when I pushed my plate away I literally said "Oh - My - God" ~ heehee. 
So I cut the recipe in half to serve 2 instead of 4 and the only problem is its so good I could probably eat the whole loaf.  While it is, in fact, Valentines Day I'm eating alone...  the other half of the loaf is my other half's but boy is it tempting just sitting there now.  I just had to come on here and share this right away..  I've never made a meatloaf before with either turkey or beef and it was so easy.  I can't tell you how much I love recipes that consist of stuff I always have on hand anyway (provided I've got turkey on hand ;)  I threw it together in minutes.  It bakes for an hour but, no big deal, I threw a couple potatoes in along with it, popped a handful of corn niblits in the microwave at the last min and Voila... Supper complete! 
Also, I brushed a bit of ketchup on top of it before it went into the oven and it gives it the nicest glaze/crust on top and even though I cut the recipe in half I still used one whole egg and still came out a perfect consistency.   I hope some of you try it, or maybe have already, if so let me know what you think.

To Everyone - Happy Valentines Day!

* To the world you are one person, to one person you are the world.

* You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly.

* There is one person in this world who loves your more than you'll ever know.

* Love is friendship set on fire.

*In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities.

* Absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it.

* I love you, not only for what you are,

but for what I am when I am with you.

* To be your friend was all I ever wanted; to be your lover was all I ever dreamed.

* I love him and that's the beginning of everything.

Today I learned...

... that doing something (a workout) is always better than doing nothing.
... that its mid-february and my 2010 mantra "Do It Anyway" is still effective for me.  That feels good.  Keep it up Keri!

10 things to lighten the mood

I first wanna start by saying thanks for the comment Diz, if I had read that sooner I may not have had my episode last night.  Well, I'm not going to make my meeting this morning the roads are just terrible.  I'm so completely bummed.  Last night it started coming down out of nowhere.  I just knew in my heart I was not going to make it to my meeting.  I really wanted to hold on to the hope that I would be going but this sent me into such a depression, so what happened?  I could not stop eating.  I ate my emotional weight in crackers, cheese, special K crisps, my bf's "off limit" chips, ice cream bars.  Omg, I buy the low fat, no sugar, low cal options for all this crap but what difference does that make when you stack it all in a pile and dive in head first.  Well, ok that didn't really happen but its all in a pile at this point.  Ugh.  I'm needing an extra boost for this week already, I can feel it, normally I would get that from my meeting.  I thought about going on Monday but thats not realistic.  Saturday is cheat day, and I look foward to my greasy burger all week.

Now for something different if only to lift my mood a bit and change the tone I'm going to name 10 random things about me. I always love when people put random lists on their blogs, they make me smile.  Doing my own list may be a little harder though.  Here goes.
10 Random Things About Me.

1. I have 2 brothers no sisters- One older one younger.
2. I have a big family and we're really close.  (My Big Fat Greek Wedding comes to mind)  I have 26 first cousins.
3. I am truly very proud that I come from Nova Scotia, its the nicest and coolest province in all of Canada.  People love Nova Scotians all over  the country and people who have traveled there rave about it.  (trust me on this)
4. My first job was as a Cashier at a grocery store and it still remains one of my favorite jobs ever! 
5. I have zero patience for random kids misbehaving in public places.  I glare at them and I have scared a few into submission.
6. If Forrest Gump is on TV - I'm watching it!
7. I will watch a movie on tv with commercials before I would take the dvd out of my cabinet and watch it.
8. I *sigh* a lot and I take a lot of deep breaths.  Its a weird compulsion.  People alway think I'm frustrated.
9. Of all my small accomplishments in life, I'm most proud of being able to call myself a runner. 
10. I will never in this lifetime run a marathon.   I don't get that being a goal for anyone, I'm sorry.  Even if someone can run 15 miles straight, 26.2 is still torture.  People get sick, they bleed from weird places, they're hospitalized... I mean... forget that!

Well that was not so hard, probably not the most important things to me but they were the first random 10 that popped into my head.  I'll have to do that again sometime.  Anyway, so if anyone has some encouraging words for me I could sure use them right now.

Eat Fresh!

Ok I have to rant about Subway first thing this morning.  I hate that Subway is something I can't splurge on in the middle of the week.  Subway has to be a cheat meal for me and I hate that.  So yesterday we were painting our upstairs and I forgot to take something out for supper so I said to J wanna get some $5 footlongs?  I still had 13 pts left and my sub minus mayo, replaced with a little oil is 12 pts.  Anyway, we got subway, and I'm not gonna lie, I can inhale a footlong (maybe thats my problem).   I was so proud that I didn't get mayo for the very first time in life, and well it was not as good but definitely not awful.  Well I just knew all night that I was gonna pay for that on the scale in the morning (bathroom scale).  I've been dropping all week, this morning I'm up 1.4lbs!! "I knew it" I huffed from the bathroom.  Its the bread, I get it but I'm just mad at myself for thinking I could have a yummy sub two days before a weigh in.  So, am I alone on this? I actually had another friend confirm this happens to her too, so I guess I'm not the only one but I'm just so frustrated that I'm up and now I have to try and get that off and more before tomorrow!!!  UGH!  Right after I saw my weight I Shredded..  Level 2 is tough. Whoo, and now I'm going to paint for the rest of the day.   Note to self "take out chicken now before you start convincing yourself a big mac and fries wouldn't be that bad".

Today I learned...

... that I cannot eat Subway and  not gain weight.

Food for thought...

When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change

Today I learned...

... that you burn 306 cal/hour painting.  I burned too many to count today.
... that I can enjoy a Subway sub without mayo.

Today I learned...

... something reeeeeeeally strange.  I was reminiscing over Cabbage Patch Dolls with my bf's mother and I told her I still remember the names of the 2 I had when I was a kid - Jennifer and Sabrina.  No sooner were the words out of my mouth and we both were just shocked.  Those are the names of my bf's 2 step-sisters.  I can't believe I never made that connection before.  Is that weird or is that weird???  Anyway, just thought I'd share.  Gives me goosebumps even now... lol.
... that I officially own my car.  Goodbye car payments!

FAT CLOTHES

I just want to start off by saying I just watched one of the worst movies I ever saw - Rachel Getting Married.  LOL ok, but it brings me to my rant.  I was so bored I started staring over at my closet and something occured to me.  I noticed that at the end of my closet is a collection of clothes that got pushed to the end because I don't wear them anymore...... the fat clothes, we all got 'em.  So here's my dilemma, I go back and forth over what to do with fat clothes.  Since I'm a regainer, a former thin chick, sometimes I think back to all the clothes I gave away that first time I lost a pile and when I regained I thought I wish I never gave that shirt away, or skirt... etc.  They say get rid of the big clothes and I do totally agree with this.  You have to go in swearing you'll never put it back on... just have to.  Anyway, I also want to say that I LOATHED when people would give me their fat clothes.  Hate hate hate it, I hated being over weight, I was dillusional about it and that anyway saw me this way.  When people would hand me their jeans that are too big for them, it felt like "hey I thought of all the people in my life that are much bigger than me and your name was on the top of the list".  Now, I know this would never be the intention of anyone to make me feel this way, but hey when you're overweight you're sensitive about it.  However, now I'm in the position of having a bunch of clothes I'll never wear again and some really nice stuff that I hate don't fit me anymore (i'm not complaining!!).  It would love to pass on the nice clothes to someone I love but I don't have it in me to say "this doesn't fit me anymore, yay for me, but hey you're still fat, want it?".  Obviously that would never come out of my mouth, but fat clothes really are a dilemma for me.  I know I'll just end up giving them to good-will because I don't have the heart to make someone else feel the way I did.  Ok rant over.

Today I learned...

... my bf feels very strongly about me taking his last name if/when we get married.  I couldn't be happier that he feels this way.  This conversation was sparked after a controversial article I read today. 
What are you thoughts?
 http://www.embracethechaos.ca/  (I'm not a Mrs.)

Did anyone watch Celebrity Fit Club last night?

Ok, I've only ever watched this show a few times and I never liked it even a 10th of how much I love Biggest Loser so I refused to watch it, and quite frankly I HATE when shows have so-called celebrities and I haven't heard of half of them.  Anyway, I digress, but since K-Fed & B Brown were on it I thought I'd check it out for curiousity sake.  Really not bad.   So, they weigh in at the end of the show and I knew that Nicole Eggert had put on some weight because she's been in the tabloids a bit and I'll be honest, it looks like she's carrying around an extra 30-40 lbs from her Baywatch days... and if you were on Baywatch you're sort of held to a certain standard.  Now let me just say this, by my standards I think she looks fabulous, the extra weight looks good on her and whatever.. ya know?  So she steps on the scale and I literally said to my boyfriend "mmm I'd say 165-170"  and then my jaw dropped open...   wait for it..........  130lbs!!!!  Did you see it???  Omg.. ok so that brings me back to something I was just talking about a few days ago.  I sat there with my mouth gaped open I couldn't believe it.  The doctor on the show said, "you know most people would even wonder why you're here"... she said that she's used to being 99lbs..  (which is completely insane in itself).  But its just proves two points 1). You really can't tell how much a person weighs by looking at them, people all carry it different and someones else's 125 might be my 150, you just can't tell and you can NEVER judge your weight & appearance by what someone else looks like.  and 2).  I cannot say this enough, if you're used to being a certain weight and you're carrying an extra 20lbs -30lb pounds around (even 10) YOU FEEEEEEL IT.   You feel it everywhere, every minute of every day...  in the mirror, in the shower, in your jeans, in the arms of someone else..    Am I right ladies, or am I right?

An afternoon away from the fridge

Today I made a conscious decision to actually leave my house as to not eat everything in site.  It was about 3pm and I had already had an afternoon snack, a whole grain waffle (1 pt) and a tsp of peanut butter (2 pts)... good choice you might say?  Well as I was eating it, as delish as it was, I could just tell that this was not going to be the last thing I ate before supper.  My bf had asked mer if I wanted to go to walmart..  I said no, I didn't really want to go.  Fortunately 20 mins later he was still kicking around so I said yeah what the hell I'll go along. We ended up killing 2 hours in Walmart, taking our time, checking things out, and I got myself a new sportsbra that was much needed.  When we got home it was time to start supper and I was completely ravenous at this point.  I was so proud of myself for actively distracting myself.  Little accomplishments a little bit at a time.. hahaha. 
You know, it occurs to me what a different person I am this second time around losing weight and if there's one major lesson I'm learning is that the smallest of details, rewards, accomplishments add up to so much more than the weight lost..   I think that will be what keeps it off this time.  Last time I remember thinking, yeah I'll reward myself when I'm at goal weight.  Well if I'm expecting this journey to ever come to an end I'm seriously setting myself up for dissapointment.

Today I learned...

... that the surgical tool used to removed tonsils is called a guillotine.  Yikes.  Also learned how to spell that.
... that if I can't think of anything I've learned yet today I can always rely on my daily dose of Jeopardy to teach me something I did not know. 

Today I learned...

... that I've been doing a pretty good job with eyeballing a lot of foods I should have been measuring.  I measured everything I ate today and I must say, I've been pretty damn close.
... that a football game can actually fly by when I'm on my computer and only looking up for commercials.  "Half-Time already???"

Today I learned...

... that no matter how much a person has to lose, whether it be 15 or 150 lbs, the struggle is the same, the challenges are the same, the WEIGHT & FAT are the same, and we all lose it & gain it the same.

More Rewards

In continuation of my rewards day I bought myself a new digital kitchen scale.  I have a scale already but its not digital and, quite frankly, it was cheap-so it sucks.  When you tap it the lever bounces around so its not accurate.  I've wanted a digital scale for so long but I rarely spend my money (these days) on anything that I don't absolutely need.  However, I felt 35 lbs off was the perfect excuse to treat myself.  Here's the one I got and it was only $19.99, I think thats very decent. 

Its funny how it kinda crept up on me that I lost 35 lbs.  I have the bad habit of rounding up sometimes.  When people ask me how much I've lost and I'm 33.8 I just say 35lbs cause I feel that being too specific sounds weird.  It shouldn't I know, I should exclaim every ounce but I just go "oh about 35" and then what happens?  I actually hit 35lbs (or 20 or 25... etc)  and its anticlimactic because I've been saying "35!!!!' for weeks.. lol.  Yeah like I said, its a bad habit.  Anyway, today it just kinda hit me (I think when my leader was counting out all my 5lb stars) that I have hit quite a nice milestone.  35 pound off BABY!!!   So with this present I bought myself I'm dedicated to weighing & measuring better than ever in order to get this last 15 lbs off!!

Rewards

I just got back from my weigh-in and lost 1.6!! So excited.  I also decided to stay after my meeting and talk to my leader about rewards that I had not received.  I had my 10% keychain already but I never received my 25 lb charm and also my 16 week charm.  I figured since I was now 16 weeks at the new WW location it was fitting.  Since I left Canada and started going in the States I kind of had to start over on the weight counter but I've been keeping track of my total amount lost.  Since I started down here I've lost 14.8 but I'm down 35.6 total....  and I don't need another 10% key chain I need my 25lb charm!!.   I wasn't going to bring it up because I felt silly looking for these rewards that may seem insignificant but the more I thought about them the more I wanted them, and dammit I worked hard to get those 35lbs off and if its a key charm that is a reminder for me and makes me feel good about it then I deserve it! 

When I brought this up to my leader after the meeting she was all too happy to give me whatever I was owed... she was looking for any little thing she could give me so she gave me 7- 5lb stickers and a bookmark.  I love it!  I'm so happy that I had a good week and I know it was due to having different foods in the cupboard.  I'm also really happy that its cheat day because, boy am I craving a cheeseburger & onion rings.  Yummmm   hey I've earned it :)

Today I learned...

... that a pound of ground chicken has 20 points.  7 more points than lean ground beef, why bother?

You make me happy when skies are grey

Well, its another rainy day so I couldn't jog... so much for two days in a row :(  I really wanted to get another jog in before my weigh-in tomorrow.  Its been pouring down rain since last night and they're calling for flood warnings and who knows what else.  Its not supposed to be good anyway, so I'm just hoping and praying that I can make it to my meeting tomorrow.  I really can't miss two weeks in a row.  I think I did ok this week, I really started making better food choices.  I'm getting over a bit of a hump on my home scale (yes, i'm on the team of people who weigh at home also, it works for me).. I'm just hoping I can hold on to this loss till tomorrow and it shows at WW.  Because I couldn't run today I had to shred.  I was gonna blog earlier and complain about how I was unmotivated again today but I wouldn't let myself blog till after I worked out.  I guess this is my reward, but at least now I'm done, showered and relaxed for another friday evening.  As a bonus tonight I'm watching the Biggest Loser that I missed on Tuesday because Lost started up again.  I hate that Lost and The Biggest Loser are on at the same time, but wasn't Lost a-ma-zing?  omg its been off so long I forget how much I love it. 
Just for something else very random, here are the latest songs on my mp3 player that inspire me.
1. The Climb - Miley Cyrus
2. Its Your Life - Francesca Battistelli
3. Proud (The Biggest Loser Theme Song) - Heather Small
4. Who I Was Born To Be - Susan Boyle

Here are a couple songs that make me run a little faster or push a little harder.
1. Bad Romance - Lady Gaga
2. For Your Entertainment - Adam Lambert
3. Just Dance - Lady Gaga
4. See You Again - Miley Cyrus
5. Since U Been Gone - Kelly Clarkson
6. Try Sleeping With a Broken Heart - Alicia Keys

Even though a lot of the music I consider my favorite doesn't fit any of these genres, I have to say that listening to Dance, HipHop & Pop while I run or workout is sort of my guilty pleasure.
Weight Watchers first thing in the morning, wish me luck.

Today I learned...

... that I like the show Glee.
... that getting out of a food rut is as easy as buying lots different fruits & veggies.

Today I Jogged

Finally, today I jogged.  I was really starting to miss it.  I got up first thing this morning and looked out the window as I always do...  no snow, no rain......  no sun :( oh well.. todays the day.  Its been a week since I jogged, and I was eager to get back to it.  It was pretty cold starting out and I had to side step a few icy patches but otherwise it was great, I did my 3 miles.  I still have yet to shred today but I'm gonna do that as soon as I get remotivated.  I know why I jog first thing in the morning, otherwise I just wouldn't do it at all.  I'm so lazy in the afternoon...  gotta get the energy to shred!  I was reading in a magazine that people who do their workout in the morning are more likely to stick with it... this is so true for me because I've been walking/joggin everyday since July and thats the longest I've ever stuck to a workout.  The very first part of my day is my workout, mainly just to get it over with but it sets the tone for my day and now I can't live without it.  

Today I learned...

... that nonfat plain yogurt has 17 grams of sugar per cup!  Its bitter, how can this be?!?

Today I learned...

... that today (Feb 2) is Groundhog Day.
... that my boyfriend hates Pierce Brosnan movies except for - get this - Mrs Doubtfire!  I'm rethinking this relationship.
... the word Laodicean means Indifferent, also the winning word for the 2009 Schepp Spelling Bee.

Its the end of this rut (as I know it) and I feel fine

Today I'm taking the first steps to get out of my rut. Its grocery day and I've decided that I'm doing away with 100 calorie snacks. From now on when I need a snack, or something sweet, its going to be an apple, an orange, a banana, or yogurt & berries. Not 2 point cheetos, or 2 pt chocolate covered pretzels, or 2 pt little debbies snack cakes (which are the size of my thumb anyway), or 2 tiny little chocolate chip cookies. I used to think these 100 calorie snacks were the greatest thing ever invented but they are just unsatisfying and nothing else... certainly not nutritional.
Unfortunately, its raining today so my next step of getting back to jogging will have to be put off a little longer. At least the rain will help get rid of this snow, so I can wait, I'll just keep on "shreddin".

Attitude is the way you...

... feel when you wake up in the morning.
... talk to your significant other.
... sit at the breakfast table.
... treat your kids.
... drive to work.
... greet your coworkers.
... greet your family.

Your attitude is Everything!

Today I learned...

... the definition of PENULTIMATE - Second to last.
... that I need an attitude adjustment.

Boredom

First thing this morning I got all geared up ready to go for a jog. I drove to the track and it was a sheet of ice. Its days like this I really miss having a treadmill. Since I was already in my workout gear I came back home and "Shredded" right away. I got a nice sweat-on doing the shred but its just not the same. I need my jog! I never realized how much until I go this many days without it. I haven't jogged since thursday. I am loving the shred but if I only do that 25 min workout per day I just don't feel like I burnt as many calories as I could and should.
I also feel like I really need a hobby, this boredom I'm feeling lately is just making me want to eat... between lunch and dinner feels like a lifetime and snacks just are not cutting it. I could eat 4 snacks in the afternoon and still be unsatisfied. Its just not a great couple of weeks for me and its clear why I've hit a plateau. What do I do to cure the winter boredom not only with the day but with my diet?